From the Hammock - Final Thoughts and Reflections on Isla

Well we're now home and back to reality and I have a few reflections to share.

Reflection #1

Playing mermaids is not as much fun when you don’t have your little sister to play with. Mr. Granny pants was just not into it. I did, however, love how agile and graceful  I could be in the water and yes…I did pretend to be a mermaid.

Reflection #2

Tourists can be idiots. I don’t know how many times I saw creepy tourist ladies reaching out and touching little local Mayan children, stroking them as though they were some kind of exotic creature. The poor kids were frozen in terror and their parents were too polite and meek to tell the old yellow teethed dragon ladies to back off. 

Reflection #3

There is never, ever a right time to wear a banana hammock…ever. But definitely do not wear a banana hammock if:

• Your banana is past its expiration date 
• When looking down you cannot see your banana
• The elastic in your hammock has lost its elasticity and your banana is in danger of escaping

Reflection #4

Watching a spectacular sunset never gets boring

In a Nutshell:

This has, by far, been one of the most relaxing vacations ever. The majority of the time we had our hotel completely to ourselves. We actually got annoyed when people had the nerve to show up. Luckily they were only there for a day or two and we would then have our private villa to ourselves. I even did something very naughty. 

I swam naked in the pool one night. I haven’t done that in a very long time. I loved how my boobies floated ever so nicely. They haven’t been that perky in a very long time.

Oh...And I could very easily live in a house that exploded out of a crayola box....preferably a hot pink house with lime green walls and a purple ceiling.